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Sea Cows in the Mirror

I can well remember one of my all time favorite bits done by comedian Dennis Miller. It was a part of his opening monologue on his HBO talk show. The topic of this particular show was overeating in the American culture. Without wanting to get on a "rant", the phrase which would proceed every rant in his monologue, Miller talked about how super sizing, extra large portions, and the ready availabilities of Cinnabon in this country, were causing the population of this great nation of ours to have increasingly generous portions themselves. Of course, the people themselves were unaware of the effects of their over indulgence. Until one day while walking in the mall they happen to catch a glimpse of themselves in a full length mirror and think, "Well, that's odd. Not only has that sea cow learned to walk around upright, but it's wearing the exact same clothes that I put on this morning". I laughed and laughed. It's a good bit. Bravo, Mr. Miller, bravo indeed. Well just today, I was editing some of the behind the scenes footage from the upcoming mega hit Zombies During Third Period... Again, and I saw myself in some of the footage. I'm not laughing anymore.

To be honest, gentle reader, there were a couple of things wrong with that picture. First, and most obviously, was seeing someone who looked a lot like me, but who also looked as if they had eaten me. There is no way that just one of me should be taking up all the space that the person I saw on tape occupying. When I dream of becoming a real live, honest to goodness filmmaker, all of those dreams include a perfect me. In my mind's eye, as I'm strolling down the red carpet, I don't dream of my need for a walker because my knees can no longer support the weight that is me. I dream that I am in the shape of my life. After all, it's a dream that I wish to come true, why cloud the issue with realism? However, seeing myself in a fat suit, minus the fat suit, is not the worst part of what I have allowed to, (or have actively participated in making) happen to myself. Far more alarming than my need to work on multiple facets of myself to make my dreams come true, is my increasing inability to work towards those dreams. During the last week I have felt tired, all the time. It's hard to push ahead, and blaze trails, when deep down inside you just wish that someone would declare that it's officially nap time. With the deadline to enter the film into Comic Con drawing closer by the day, the cast and crew of Zombies has really stepped up in an effort to make the deadline. I find that I am struggling a bit to keep up the pace. Now, when running down school hallways, pushing a camera rig in front of young people almost twenty years my junior, I expect to be tired. But, when kids are asking me if I am trying to show them the perfect Zombie shuffle, and I'm just walking to the next location, I know that something is, how do you say... amiss. For the first time in my life, I'm finding I may have to start exercising and eating better, just to make it through the day and still be standing at the end of it. Who knew that in order to pursue something as outrageous as becoming a real live, honest to goodness filmmaker, one would have to do things as practical and ordinary as eat right, go to bed at a decent hour, and get a little exercise from time to time. As unbelievable as it may have seemed at the time, it turns out, Mom knew what she was talking about after all.


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